Nowadays a lot of couples do not feel the necessity of getting married to have children. Young people being in love do not hurry to make their relationships official in order to create a family; modern society has a different look on the contemporary situation. Cohabitation and having children before the marriage is considered to be the usual situation of most modern couples. Nevertheless, there are certain contradictions in society as to the idea of having children without the official marriage certificate because of the parents’ obligations provided with marriage.
There is a tendency to believe that marriage makes mutual relationships in the family stronger providing a certain level of security for the children. Sociology discloses a great majority of myths connected with the power of marriage given to children and their parents. For example, some people consider that having children always brings the members of the family closer making them happy. Nevertheless, more and more couples start having children before their marriage living for several years as a family, and only then decide to make their relationships official. Along with this fact, many social studies have shown that the first baby of the married parents results in pushing the parents apart and leading to the stress of the young family. The only fact to support this idea is the lower divorce rate of couples having children.
It should be stressed that having children before marriage has a lot of positive aspects. Firstly, a young couple is not afraid of the responsibilities of bringing a new life; it reduces the rate of abortion among people who are not ready for marriage for some reason. Statistics have shown that there are a lot of families who had their first child before the marriage getting the necessary experience in parenting and understanding the peculiarities of cohabitation beforehand. Thus, to create a family with children does not compulsory mean to get married at once at the period of pregnancy. Certainly, marriage plays an important role for every family but the time of its formation can be after the birth of the first child.
The tendency discussed above can be proved by official surveys. For example, about 37% of US children have been born outside of marriage. Besides the number of couples being unmarried and living together has increased in the USA for the last several years; it reached 4 000 000 by current period. Considering the fact that the rate of divorce has considerably raised throughout the world, the modern generation does not perceive marriage as something important for creating a real family; as the questionnaire has shown for many couples marriage is just a paper or a document of their family. The number of unmarried couples living together and having children has increased due to the following factors:
- The level of independent living has grown; the raise of financial stability among the population;
- The absence of religious prohibition for having children before the marriage;
- The increase of divorce rate; (Champlin, 2003)
These factors are considered to be the background of the modern situation. The desire of having children should not be an obstacle for unmarried couples. The meaning of “traditional family” for the modern generation substitutes the notion of one of the current lifestyles. The life of the child and parents’ attitude to it does not depend on the status of the family. There are plenty of couples living in the USA whose children have grown up and left their homes, though their parents are not married and even do not plan to do it; nevertheless, they live a happy life and managed to bring up their children.
So, the analysis of the current situation of marriage institutions has proved that couples do not perceive the official ceremony as the way to the happiness of their children and themselves. Despite this fact, there are some opposed opinions as to this position. For example, the modern church states that cohabitation and children outside of marriage cannot bring physical and emotional health to all members of the so-called family. It underlines some factors being the reason for cohabitation:
- The abortion legalization;
- The increase of culture mobility among the population;
- The level of graduate studies has grown a lot;
- Independent and fast pace of life observed in the USA.
It should be noted that some people start living with their significant others just for convenience; for example, the young couple can share the apartment or be linked through financial aspects. In such cases the birth of the child can lead to the breakage of relationships as the couple does not realize the seriousness of responsibilities taken with parenting. The birth of the child can push a couple apart with difficulties of having the child. (Popenoe, Top ten Marriage Myths).
Some people believe that pregnancy is the principal reason for marriage. But do the relationships change after the ceremony?… Certainly, they do not. Conservative people tend to consider marriage as the key step for happiness and eternal life together till death. But it is a myth. Frankly speaking neither a wedding license nor children can strengthen the family. Only the couple covered by the atmosphere of love, harmony, and mutual understanding will be able to create a happy family even having children outside of marriage. People should remember that giving birth to a child is a serious and responsible step for every member of the family; to make this step means to think carefully about one’s future plans and decide whether the person is ready to devote himself to the child.
Unplanned pregnancy is a usual phenomenon nowadays, but it should be noted that it is not the reason for marriage or abortion. The emotional balance of the couples and their readiness to create a strong and loving family would be the main stimulator of having the child. The institution of marriage is just the official document for every couple and only its members can provide a safe and happy future for their children.
So, it is necessary to highlight the fact that having children outside of marriage is a normal phenomenon nowadays. Nobody but parents is responsible for the happiness of their children and well being of their mutual relationships; the awareness of responsibilities taken with the birth of the child would improve family life in the future. Certainly, there are some opposed opinions stating that marriages are the background of love and wealth in the family; in most cases, these are the main reasons for creating the family.
Contemporary society lives in a period of high independence, both emotional and financial. People do not strive to hurry to create families but to live for themselves and be prepared for serious steps in life. Having children outside the marriage is an important and responsible step, but it can be taken if the parents feel love and respect for each other.
References
- Popenoe, D. Top ten Marriage Myths. Love and Relationships Center.
- Champlin, J. Cohabitation Before Marriage. Catholic Update. 2003.
J. Brady’s And A. Brott’s Articles On Sexism Review
A Comparison of the Essays “I Want A Wife” and “Not All Men Are Sly Foxes”
- Thesis Statement: Why a wife is more useful than a husband
- Introduction to marriage
- Definition of a Traditional Marriage
- In the dictionary
- By married couples
- Definition of a Traditional Marriage
- The Modern Marriage vs. The Traditional Marriage
- Responsibilities of a traditional wife
- To her husband
- To her children
- Responsibilities of a modern wife
- To her husband
- To her children
- Responsibilities of a traditional wife
- I want a Wife by Judy Brady
- Not all men are sly foxes by Armin A. Brott
- Comparison of the two author views
- Conclusion
Draft Version
A Comparison of the Essays “I Want A Wife” and “Not All Men Are Sly Foxes”
The common dictionary definition of a marriage is of a union between a man and woman as defined by either the laws of the land (as in a civil marriage) or the laws of the church (as defined by a religious church wedding). Most married couples however define marriage as the tradition by which a family is founded and is the legal mark of a couple who choose to live together as accepted by society.
There are two types of marriages that exist in today’s world. The traditional marriages where the woman fulfills the role of home maker and nothing more as the husband is given all the power in the home and relationship. Then there is the modern marriage where the woman still takes on the traditional role of home maker but then also tackles part of the husband’s role as breadwinner. There is equal sharing of responsibility and tasks within the marriage, parenting, and home making.
In a traditional marriage, the sole responsibility of raising the children and making sure that the husband is always happy falls upon the wife who often ends up unhappy and unfulfilled as such a set up does not allow her to explore all her possibilities as an individual.
The modern marriage however puts more pressure on the wife because of the way she is expected to effectively portray her part as the traditional and dutiful wife while all the time trying to realize her own potential as an individual. This often leads to stress within the marriage as often time, the burgeoning career of a woman proves to be a potential threat to the masculinity of her husband who may be equal to or lower in rank to his wife profession wise.
In her essay “I Want a Wife”, Judy Brady effectively narrates the reason why a man never has his life to good and easy as when he takes on a wife either in a traditional or modern marriage set up. For a man, getting married means getting a maid, a mother, a lover, a baby sitter, and a financial partner whenever need be. A woman’s role in the marriage will vary and depend upon the needs of her husband who in turn, seems cold, unfeeling, and unappreciative of his wife. In her opinion, a wife is often taken for granted and seen as nothing more than a piece of equipment for the husband to use. When in reality, a woman can be a man’s equal in every aspect of marriage and responsibility.
But Armin A. Brott begs to differ with Ms. Brady. through his writing “Not All Men Are Sly Foxes”, he portrays men as getting the short end of the stick in terms of relationships. He believes that the gender bias has affected men more because women have been the traditional care taker of the family thus making society view men who try to do their part in caring for the home as without a clue and impatient. He senses that men can do just as well as women in raising a family if only given the chance to do so.
In the end, both essays make a good case for both writers. Ms. Brady explains the suffocating environment faced by both the traditional and modern wife, while Mr. Brott effectively argues the case of discrimination against husbands due to the gender bias about who should traditionally raise and care for the family while one earns the income to keep the family together and alive.
Final Version
A Comparison of the Essays “I Want A Wife” and “Not All Men Are Sly Foxes”
Women they say, are the stronger sex. Mainly because even though men are physically the stronger sex, women have been gifted with the uncanny ability to be able to perform multiple tasks that include the duties of men as family providers, whenever the situation calls for it. The gender roles in marriage often call for the man to be the leader of the family but in truth, it is the woman who shoulders the brunt of the responsibility of creating a well rounded family unit. She responds to overall needs of the family members, as well as to her own personal needs without complaint or doubt. Something that most men, in their role as husbands fail to accomplish most times. A woman is a wife for only a time, for in the event of a divorce, she becomes a mother, provider, and father to those left in her care. Thus leading the stressed out primary provider to oftentimes say ” I want a wife!” as well. For a family man once divorced leaves all his previous responsibilities to his wife and becomes a single man again. While a wife will forever be the ex-wife, but mother and permanent provider to the children produced by that dissolved marriage. This is evidenced by the opening lines of the essay “I Want A Wife” by Judy Brady:
Not too long ago a male friend of mine appeared on the scene from the Midwest fresh from a recent divorce. He had one child, who is, of course, with his ex-wife. He is obviously looking for another wife.
The common dictionary definition of a marriage is of a union between a man and woman as defined by either the laws of the land or the laws of the church . The traditional responsibilities of a married couple have been the same all throughout the existence of the term marriage and all it entails. The man, is expected to provide a house, money, heirs, and other needs that are entailed in the raising of a family. A wife on the other hand is expected to keep her husband happy by keeping his home in a manner by which he can proudly brag to his peers, and allowing her husband to improve as an individual even if it means sacrificing many things on the part of the wife. But, in her essay, Judy Brady disagrees with this gender role specific definition because of the way a wife has to help her husband provide for the family and her husbands financial needs as well. To quote:
I would like to go back to school, so that I can become economically independent, support myself, and, if need be, support those dependent upon me. I want a wife who will work and send me to school. And while I am going to school I want a wife to take care of my children.
It is understood that a woman is traditionally a wife, lover, and mother to her children. But when a traditional wife also has to work to help support the family and keep her husband in a lifestyle that he is accustomed to, something is terribly wrong in terms of gender responsibility. Although it is commendable for a wife to help a husband through school, it is unfair for a husband to expect his wife to make all the sacrifices that will eventually end in his achieving his personal ambition. In a traditional marriage, everything is centered about the husband, the children, and their needs. The wife is merely a foot soldier who insures that everyone else around her is happy and content.
Then there is the modern marriage where the woman still takes on the traditional role of home maker but then also tackles part of the husband’s role as breadwinner. There is equal sharing of responsibility and tasks within the marriage, parenting, and home making. In a traditional marriage, the sole responsibility of raising the children and making sure that the husband is always happy falls upon the wife who often ends up unhappy and unfulfilled as such a set up does not allow her to explore all her possibilities as an individual.
Judy Brady effectively narrates the reason why a man never has his life to good and easy as when he takes on a wife either in a traditional or modern marriage set up. For a man, getting married means getting a maid, a mother, a lover, a baby sitter, and a financial partner whenever need be. A woman’s role in the marriage will vary and depend upon the needs of her husband who in turn, seems cold, unfeeling, and unappreciative of his wife. In her opinion, a wife is often taken for granted and seen as nothing more than a piece of equipment for the husband to use. When in reality, a woman can be a man’s equal in every aspect of marriage and responsibility.
But Armin A. Brott begs to differ with Ms. Brady. through his writing “Not All Men Are Sly Foxes”. He believes that the gender bias has affected men more because women have been the traditional care taker of the family but that men can do just as well as women in raising a family if only given the chance to do so. He states that:
The same negative stereotypes also show up in literature aimed at the parents of small children. In What to Expect the First Year, the authors answer almost every question the parents of a newborn or toddler could have in the first year of their child’s life. They are meticulous in alternating between references to boys and girls. At the same time, they refer almost exclusively to “mother” or “mommy.” Men, and their feelings about parenting, are relegated to a nine-page chapter just before the recipe section.
But because of the rampant cases of divorce and abandonment, men will continue to be portrayed in a negative light in the future. Mr. Brady further explains that:
Unfortunately, it’s still true that, in our society, women do the bulk of the child care, and that thanks to men abandoning their families, there are too many single mothers out there. Nevertheless, to say that portraying fathers as un-nurturing or completely absent is simply “a reflection of reality” is unacceptable.
In the end, both essays make a good case for both writers. Ms. Brady explains the suffocating environment faced by both the traditional and modern wife, while Mr. Brott effectively argues the case of discrimination against husbands due to the gender bias about who should traditionally raise and care for the family while one earns the income to keep the family together and alive.
Federico Fellini Films Analysis
Cinematography is a rather complicated type of art. The film is the imaginary reality, which is created to give people some useful information, to give food for thoughts or just to entertain. The film industry is very popular among people. People watch films for different purposes, the main of which is to relax, to leave reality, and to dip into the new reality created by the film.
We are going to present Fellini’s films and his view that human experience is, fundamentally and inherently, a complex blend of dream, imagination, and fact. Federico Fellini was born on January 20, 1920, in Italy. He was fond of painting in his childhood and when he was 17 he started to write film scripts.
Fellini starts his career in cinema as an assistant and scriptwriter in Rossellini’s film “Paisa”. Fellini was influenced by Rossellini’s views, outlook and as a result, it influenced his future works. He creates the film “Variety Lights” (1950) with Alberto Lattuada.
The other films which should be mentioned, if we have decided to analyze Fellini’s works, are “The Road”, “Nights of Cabiria”, “The Sweet Life”, “Fellini’s Casanova”. These films Of Federico Fellini received Oscars in different periods of his career.
The first film “The White Sheik” was not very popular. His biggest success was with the film “La Strada” (1954). Fellini received “Oscar” with this film as the best foreign film and some other prizes. This film brought Fellini world glory. The last Fellini’s films did not have big success: he was reproached in reiteration of himself, in tiredness. But he continued to shoot films despite the critics. Only now we may say that his last films are a heritage of that big cinematography style, which must have gone with the death of Federico Fellini.
The relationship between reality and illusion is a central issue in Fellini’s films. We are going to discuss two of Fellini’s films and to understand how the films (“The White Sheik” and “8 ½”) present Fellini’s view that human experience is, fundamentally and inherently, a complex blend of dream, imagination, and fact.
“The White Sheik” is Fellini’s first personal film. It was written for Michelangelo Antonioni, but he refused to shoot the film with a script from Fellini, so Fellini shoots the film by himself. The film did not have success, maybe because of unpopular actor Alberto Sordi.
The film is about two young newlyweds, Wanda (Brunella Bovo) and Ivan Cavalli (Leopoldo Trieste) who went on their honeymoon to Rome from a provincial town. Husband is trying to his seriousness and importance, and his wife, very calm and dreaming person, who is fond of cinematography.
When the husband turns asleep, his wife runs away to the movie set where her favorite actor, the White Shake is shooting. She adores him, she is fond of him, and she is creasy about him. He seems so ideal on the screen, but in reality, he turns to be different from what she expected to see. And she decides to come back to her husband.
While the wife is absent, her husband tries to do all he can to hide the disappearance of his wife. He organizes an affair with a prostitute and her friend. All these scenes have a very humorous effect.
The film “The White Sheik” is a portrayal of adventures of “small” people, who are presented with rare charm, humor, and love, which soften the satiric view on all these love affairs.
Reality and illusion are closely interconnected in this film. Every episode of the film makes it clear to us where the reality is and where the illusion is. But there are some episodes, where even the audience may have different opinions. As an example, we are going to take the episode when the husband the next day recollects in his memory his previous night’s behavior. The question is whether he tells the truth or not. The right answer is not given. It is due to people choosing what they want to percept, whether reality or illusion, the assessment of the situation depends only on people’s perception.
Any episode in any film may be either reality or an illusion, everything depends on how people percept it. It may be said that perception is reality. There is a series of perceptions in the film. The perception of Wanda about her hero, the White Sheik, then it comes to the perception of Ivan Cavalli about the fact of his wife’s slipping out of him, and the last is the perception of Ivan Cavalli’s family about the disappearance of Ivan’s wife. Of course, such construction of perceptions may be recognized only with the help of humorous and fantastic imagery.
The audience hears that “life is a dream” several times during the film. We want to ask a question, whether a dream is the same as an illusion or a perception? The film presents the viewer with the episodes, where the illusion, the dream is more desirable than reality. And it is often so in real life. People think about illusion, they want it to come true and when it does not happen they create their illusion of life, which does not exist in reality. And only our perception makes it real.
As it was said above, the film was not popular when it first appeared, but now the perception of this film has changed. People realized that the film was shot by an outstanding director, Federico Fellini, and the film is a view with this thought and is considered from this point of view. The film was created by the master so it cannot be ignored or spoiled by disgusting critiques.
People in this film are real, they are not made up, the feeling is also that they are not playing but live their life. There do not stand in for somebody else; this is what we mean when we say that they are real. The characters are symbolic images and it makes the film so effective. The film is very light and humorous, it allows us to relax and enjoy the film in a full volume.
The other film we are going to discuss is “8 ½” (1963). The title of the film is very easy to understand. Federico Fellini created 8 films of his own, and by “half” film he understands his common work with Alberto Lattuada’s “Variety Lights” (1950).
Fellini’s film “8 ½” is one of the best innovative films of the 60s of the XX century. The audience appears in the director’s laboratory, it is involved in the creative process, enters the endless game of imagination, where the reflection of reality means its transformation. This film is the embodiment of Federico Fellini’s visions, dreams, and desires on the screen.
The plot of the film dwells around the Italian director of the film, Guido Anselmi. He attempts to shoot a film about the rescue after nuclear catastrophe, starts to look for a cast, he even started to shoot. But the film stops, it is in the condition of vagueness.
The actors begin to fret, producers start to quarrel, the critiques go around Guido and constantly asking him what he is going to do. Guido does not want to devote anybody to his plans and he just turns to his own, personal, inner traveling to the recollections of his past. This past is not his but Fellini’s.
As Guido is the presentation of Fellini, so the dreams and the recollections of the past of Guido also belong to Fellini. Guido is not sure whether the theme of the film is appropriate, whether the actors fit; he is not sure what he shall start from in his film.
Guido turns to his childhood recollections and remembrances. He hopes that past will help him to find some answers to future actions. He is afraid that the present lack of ideas is not just the temporal accident, but the end: the end of ideas, the end of talent, the end of career, and the end of life. He is afraid that all he wants to reach is going to stop at the moment.
Not thinking about the end, Guido continues his work without any idea what he is doing: he invites his love and his wife, he brings a foreign actress without any idea who she is going to play. He is making some crazy actions without realizing their purposes.
This is an autobiographical story, Fellini shoots a film about himself. His hero, the director of the film, Guido, is the reflection of him on the screen. Guido, like Fellini, suffers from director’s block in his film, he cannot continue the work. He does all he can to continue the film shoot, but nothing helps. He recollects in his memory some episodes of his past which are frequently interconnected with reality.
The film is about straggle, which appears during the creative process. The film is about actors who should combine their working schedule, their working process with personal problems and relationships, with the attempt to find some real private happiness during some difficult episodes of life.
The film is the fusion of reality and dream, illusion. The most brilliant episodes, to our mind, are the recollections of Guido’s past. The episodes are so original and surprising that we suppose they cannot leave the viewers indifferent. The episodes we are talking about deal with Guido’s childhood times. He remembers the old house in the country in Romagna. The other episode is when he meets a woman on the beach in Rimini.
As we already mentioned, the film is a fusion, a mixture of dream (illusion) with reality, of art with real life. It is impossible to imagine the film without Fellini’s past recollections. This mixture of worlds, real and unreal, brings the film some vividness and completeness. The past remembrance gives the impression of improvisation in the film.
The film “8 ½” is so light, honest, and beautiful, and it appears the impression that it is that film which Guido wanted to create.
The whole film may be considered as an inner monologue. The stream of consciousness inside this inner monologue, which presents Fellini’s film, does not create any barriers between different realities in the film: the real reality, the reality of a dream, the reality of the past.
Reality and illusion are closely interconnected in the films of Federico Fellini. Every illusion is real in his films. We gave the analyses of two of Fellini’s films which prove our statement about the reality of illusions in his films, where perception plays not the last part. It was his innovation that was recognized and appreciated by critics. Federico Fellini is considered to be the master of his job.
It is impossible not to admire the works of Federica Fellini, his gift and talent, his desire to create something new and innovative. His films renewed the language of the cinema of that time and influenced the films of the several generations ahead. Federico Fellini is not alive anymore but his works are immortal. He made a great contribution to world cinematography.
At the very beginning of Fellini’s career, he was influenced by other directors’ works, and now his works influence the works of the whole generation of other inexperienced directors. Young and beginning directors take some inspiration, some ideas, experience, and desire to work from Fellini’s films. Federico Fellini is going to be an example for many generations. He was known as a master during his life and even after his death he continues to be idle of the cinematography not only in Italy but all over the world.